Aldrich Museum Employee Fired

December, 2007

The Aldrich Contemporary Art Museum announced yesterday that ATM—the world's first and only automated teller machine and stand-up comedian—has been terminated; effective immediately.

ATM was hired as a part-time customer service representative in the Museum Store and to occasionally perform his comedy routine at the Museum's First Thursdays events.

Fairfield County Times reporter Lorraine Gengo, who caught ATM's shtick this past February, wrote, "He's got a penchant for vulgar—and even pornographic—jokes." Gengo was on the money, no pun intended, in her prediction that "ATM might have another pink slip in his future."

Patti Maciesz, Aldrich Museum Store manager explains, "ATM’s sense of humor, while funny at times, is not exactly the right fit for a customer service representative at The Aldrich."

Museum officials stated, "More worrying than the off-color wisecracks, untidy habits, and profane language are the accusations by Museum Store customers over the past several months that ATM was hustling bootleg DVDs."

An unidentified source reported that ATM has plans to travel to Mexico with recent Yale graduate and close friend Bob Snead, who is rumored to be in cahoots with the accused on all counts.

When contacted, ATM refused comment, only saying that his time at The Aldrich was rewarding and he will miss the friendships he developed with many staff members.